so it’s been a long time, and here is where we’re at..,

-had lots more tests, saw the oncologist, who was less than encouraging.  kind of like a bad job interview where you really wonder what they are looking for.  They keep dropping hints.  “so this must hurt like a toothache”  well, it’s really just dull in my lower back, enough to notice, but with my underlying illness it’s hard to tell.  “should feel like a high hot pain in front.”  hesitation.  “no, it’s a dull annoying pain low in my back”  ”that time of the month must just be beyond pain”  ”well, um, sort of, but not consistent”  “so I think we may go in another direction.”  er.., wait, that was the job interview not the Oncologist.  He is very nice, his office team is truly top notch.   I JUST WANTED ANSWERS not MORE TESTS!  so I go to another ultrasound.  The tech says she can’t find it, that “it’s resolved itself”  and after the love & prayer of so many amazing people, I could believe it.  But when I called the onc’s  (pronounce aaahhhnks)  office, she said everything looked the same as before.  but I’m not putting a whole lotta credibility into that.  She said HE hadn’t looked at the test results yet, which tells me, a well meaning nurse is mollifying me until he does.  Must not be bad.  no news is ALWAYS good news.

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